Communication Troubles or Texting is Hard

Now that BlackBerry has released BBM for iPhones and Androids, everyone and their grandmother have been sharing their BBM pins. Unlike many of the people I know, I’ve decided not to download the app or the join the queue for a pin. It’s not that I have anything against BlackBerry – I’m glad to see something go well for a Canadian company that has struggled these last few years – or against BBM itself. The reason why I don’t want to start using BBM is because I can already be reached through text message, iMessage, three email accounts, three social media outlets and by phone, if you really want to call me. And though these technologies are supposed to make it easier to connect with people, I’ve found that they just make effective communication more complicated.

Texting is difficult. There are many chances for miscommunication if a message is typed incorrectly (see examples of Autocorrect gone wrong if you don’t know what I mean), or if a sentiment is misread. Many encourage the use of Emojis to clarify emotions. Yes, a smiling emoticon can effectively convey happiness, and a bag of money, a gun and some people running can effectively convey the plot of The Italian Job. But Emojis are only effective to the extent that both people know what the pictures mean, and I must admit that I don’t speak fluent Emoji. Many pepper their text messages with lol and haha, not because they think the world is uproariously funny, but because they think that if they don’t convey laughter in some way, the recipient of the text will think they are actually pretty pissed off. As someone who spends a lot of my time writing, I like to think I can convey emotions without the use of lol. As a result of my refusal to indicate laughter in text messages, the texts I send often convey a certain sort of dry humour, also known as a complete and utter lack of humour. Those who are unfamiliar with the way I write have often said that texting me can be a pretty intimidating experience. To make matters worse, my family and friends have often received messages from me that look more like modernist poems than anything that would be conventionally sent in a text. Others have received completely developed paragraphs. While some people are glad to receive my unconventional messages, others take a look at the giant bubble of text I’ve sent them, and decide that they would really rather call me.

Over time I’ve realized that while I don’t like making calls – it all stems back to a time when I thought my friend was her brother because his voice hadn’t changed yet – I really do prefer to talk on the phone. Sentiments are much clearer, and you can actually hear them laugh out loud. Considering my preference for phone calls, it may come as a surprise that I dislike all form of video calls. In theory, it seems that Skype or FaceTime would create greater immediacy than a phone call, but I spend the entire conversation distracted by a grainy image or wondering if I look as ridiculous as the little picture of me makes it seem. Even those who love Skype have said that they often face the issues of screen freezes and microphone failures. Also, sometimes I am very ready for a conversation, but I am not ready to be seen, owing to various factors such as bad hair days, breakouts, and those times when I don’t feel like putting on real clothes. And finally, I prefer to make calls when I’m walking some place. FaceTiming while I walk down the street will probably result in car accidents. No one wants that.

Facebook is useful, as are Facebook Messages. But for some reason, I always have trouble responding to Facebook messages in a timely manner. Maybe it’s because I have to open up an app and wait for the message to load. Reading that, you would think I’m talking about the effort it took for dial up internet. But as soon as I need to go through an app or a website, the conversation seems to be at a further remove, with all the same communication and emoticon issues that go along with texting.

To return to BBM, though it functions like texting, I don’t want to have to worry about responding to messages on another platform, or face the dreaded checkmark to a message read without a response. Communication is difficult enough without measuring response times. I’ll take the time that I need so I can offer the best response possible because that’s how I communicate most effectively. And maybe that’s what it’s all about, figuring out what works for you and then learning to accommodate the communication needs of others. With time you will learn that I send long paragraphs mainly when I’m excited about something (and that I use a lot of exclamation points to make up for an absence of hahas), and I will learn to put on some pants and make it through a Skype conversation. Until then, maybe you should just call me.

Song of the Day: Army of Me by Björk

What did you think it was going to be, “Call Me Maybe”?