Pass the Jelly Fish

I always prided myself on being one of those people who would eat anything. Even as a child I wasn’t a picky eater. I have eaten ostrich, jelly fish, rattle snake and all manner of strange dishes in between. I even ate and quite enjoyed what can be described as a ficken sandwich (it had to have been fish or chicken). At various points in my life, my diet has consisted of plain white kaisers and apples, Mini Wheats and peanut butter, grilled cheese and Five Alive. In second year, I had eaten enough sandwiches to furiously declare, “I’m so SICK of sandwiches!” Given the strange diets I’ve had in the past, it should come as no surprise that my diet has changed in recent years, partially because I didn’t want to get scurvy and also because I had already tried every Mini Wheats flavour a few times over. The way that my diet has changed, however, has surprised even me.

In a day and age when gluten free items are available on nearly every menu and McDonald’s offers vegetarian wraps, it’s clear that our eating habits have changed as a society. Even with the range of diets out there today, I’m reluctant to name my own diet. About a year and a half ago, I decided to become a vegetarian. Over the next few months, I went through a trial period, but I kept breaking away from vegetarianism anytime I went for sushi. After realizing that Black Dragon rolls are superior to California rolls, I decided that pescetarianism would be a better fit for me. At that point, summer was about to start and BlogTO had just updated their list of the best burgers in Toronto, so I moved into what could be called ‘weekday pescetarianism’ or ‘I eat meat when it looks good on a menu.’ It was by this method that I sampled some of the best burgers in Toronto, along with some of the best ribs and a dangerously good chicken parmesan sandwich. Admittedly, I was bothered by my ability to be so lax on the rules I had given myself, so I decided I would move into a fully pescetarian diet in September.

And move into a pescetarian diet I did, even when it meant I was eating the carrots beside the chicken wings instead of the chicken wings themselves. Unlike the years when I was eating meals of Mini Wheats, my cooking got a lot better. With the exception of the time I ate lukewarm spaghetti squash, the meals I made were great. In addition to the well balanced meals I ate, in the first few months I also ate a lot of peanut butter. I ate peanut butter in smoothies, on toast and on spoons. I went through about a jar of peanut butter a week because I still hadn’t figured out how to get mainly plant based protein into my diet. Following my peanut butter phase was my cheese phase. I developed a brilliant chipotle tofu macaroni and cheese that I made of the days when I was taking a break from smoothies and salads. Eventually all I wanted to eat was grilled cheese and guacamole, so I thought it would be safest for me to take some time away from cheese. I’ve been drinking non-dairy milk for a few years now because it tastes better in smoothies, and I ate very little yogurt, perhaps owing to childhood trauma involving yogurt tubes. When I took time away from cheese I essentially took time off of all dairy. During that time, I had more energy, shinier hair and a better singing voice. Okay, maybe nothing dramatic happened, but I did feel energetic and healthy, though that could have been owing to all the coffee I was drinking and the placebo effect. More dramatic than the results of going off dairy were the results of going back on it. I had cheese in my eggs and yogurt for a few breakfasts and within a week I started to break out like I hadn’t in a year. Rather than wait to see if my body would readjust to dairy, I went off it completely.

Friends have asked if cutting out dairy is the start of a plan to become vegan, but I don’t think I can become vegan, mainly because I’m still eating fish. When I’m asked to describe my diet, I say I’m somewhere between a pescetarian and a vegan. Having a diet that’s best described as neither nor feels a little like inventing your own religion. I have the freedom that comes from making my own rules, but in the end I know I just made the whole thing up. As someone with a diet as yet undefined, I feel no inclination to preach nutritional or ethical dogma, as I am neither trained in nutrition nor ethics. I’m not going to start showing everyone eating BLTs pictures of piglets, both because I was that person munching on a BLT a year ago, and because preaching dietary ethics is like preaching religious damnation to those who don’t believe. If you want dietary advice, to be honest, I have no right to give it. (Though I do have some advice if you find yourself going through jars of peanut butter on a weekly basis.) You may wonder why I’m writing about this in the first place. I wrote this so you know where I’m coming from if and when I talk about food. I also write about it so you know that you can invent your own diet if that’s what works for you. In the end, it’s your body, your mind, your diet, and I think you should do what all of the above as you damn well please. I changed my diet and invented my own. I had no method in doing so, but this works for me and I feel happy and healthy. My singing voice hasn’t improved, but maybe that will come after a juice cleanse or two.

Song of the Day: Habits (Stay High) by Tove Lo